Anxiety is not just about being irrationally nervous because of an uncertain, unfortunate, imminent event. Anxiety is a lot of things. It’s not a black and white disorder. It’s a lot more complicated than that.
Weirdly, having severe anxiety disorder makes you do strange things that don’t make sense to others. Even sharing these rationales to your bestest friends would make them do a confused face because they don’t get why it’s happening to you and how it’s possible. They silently think: “Ok, that’s weird,” which I can fathom since non-sufferers can really, hardly empathize.
What are the weird things that your anxiety causes you to do? I have a list but it’s just a tiny list compared to hundreds of irrational behavior we do because of the complex disorder. Do any of these sound familiar to you?
Anxiety weirdly makes me:
- Go for 40 minutes without blowing my nose when I have a cold so I don’t have to loudly blow it in front of a group of people.
- Ask my friend to order for me when we’re in a restaurant even if my order is so simple.
- Whisper my answer during a class recitation, hoping that the teacher will hear it.
- Use extremely dull pencils because I don’t want to sharpen them since that is also loud.
- Not wear the clothes I want to wear because other people might excessively comment about it.
- Finally wear the clothes I want to wear and spend the whole day worrying that everyone is judging me.
- Put down every accomplishment I have ever made for fear of being looked at as different.
- Not read a book in public because I think other people might see it like as if I’m trying to look smart.
- Look down while passing by a crowd and think of the possible bad things they’re thinking about me.
- Not show every talent and skill I have because others might think I’m showing off.
- Hesitate to wear my new clothes because my friends might think I’m also showing it off.
- Try to control my cough for several minutes because coughing might put others’ attention to me.
- Not ask for any favor from my bestest, closest friends, thinking that it might bother them.
In conclusion, I would like to reiterate a few things: Anxiety is a lot of things. It’s not a black and white disorder. It’s a lot more complicated than that.
Did you associate any of those with your anxiety?